Foamys Card Cult
Foamy Card Cults - Episode.png
Cast Germaine
Episode 1.34
Running time 1:08
Release date 2003
Producer(s) Jonathan Ian Mathers
Writer(s) Jonathan Ian Mathers
Animators(s) Jonathan Ian Mathers
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Publishers Summary[edit | edit source]

Foamy's idea for his very own cult!

Script[edit | edit source]

Germaine is standing outside a building, “St. Mooks Comics” is visible on a sign in the background, Germaine is drinking a soda.

Okay listen to this; the best idea ever! I have started the foamy card cult.
What is a “card cult”?
What’s the card cult! You don’t even know what the “card cult” is man! .. oh well okay let me explain it to you...
See what I did is I made up all these cards right, and it’s got me, the lord and master right on the front, that’s me! The Lord and Master See it says “You have been chosen” right on the card. It’s got a picture of my mug on it and everything!
Here’s what you do, you get the card. And on the back you can write your name or some kind of curse word or whatever you want… and here’s what you do.
Now once you’ve completed your mission and filled in the card with your name, or curse word or catch phrase or whatever the hell you want. You find a stranger, a complete stranger. Alright we’re not talking about one of those crazy strangers you see in the street, you know like one of those bums or anything.
We’re talking about a viable member of the community.
Because the foamy cult does not need bums! Alright!
You find a person, you give them the card. And you only say one word… “Foamy”.
That’s all you do, you hand them the card and then you go! And then on the back it has instructions on what to do with the card on the website (wacks Germaine in the eye with card.
So when they go to the website, they themselves; the new holder of the card can see what to do with the card. They can give it to somebody else and so on...
The word of foamy is spread through the land, and people can get a nifty little card they can play with! Wooo...
You’re insane...
Ahh some people just wont get the simple pleasure of spreading the word of foamy across the land… SO! Here’s what you do, you get the card you put your name and number on the back of it and you give it to somebody that you like.
Huh! Huh!.. great icebreaker.
You just say the word “Foamy” and then you just take off, this way you leave it up to them whether they call you back or not, all the information is there!
And this way they think you’re just following the instructions on the card rather than just hitting on them, see!?
Psychological kind of thing there.
With the psychology.. uhhhh it’s a little diabolical and trickery like kind of thing there, but you know we’re building a cult here.. you know there’s no time to be honest.
Ahhh.. that’s true.
And this way it gives those people who are particularly anti-social … like you! You son of a bitch! (referring to Germaine) a chance to get out into society, spread the word of foamy, gain more members to the foamy cult.
Mwa? anti-social!
The church of foamy is being built, block by block.. mind by mind! I shall rule this land! And everyone who possesses the card.
Yeah.. but will it work?
Will it work! What are you fucking stupid!? Of course it will work! Do you know how loyal my minions are! They will take these cards! They will spread them across the land, and before you know it the foamy card cult will spread across the earth and cover it in a dark cloud of squirrelly wrath.
And what will be left of you humans! Huh? HUH!?
You don’t even know do you!
I know, I know everything.. because I am the lord and master… “Foamy” and don’t you forget it!
Ha ha ha ha haaa… okay… Im done.

Ending screen appears.

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